Ep. 76: Why Your Unmet Expectations Create Pain and Conflict

How are hidden expectations creating unseen conflict and emotional reactions in your interactions?

In this episode, Bill and Scott explore how unacknowledged and unmet expectations create relational conflict and emotional disappointment. While expectations are a reality in humans, some become demands that are usually defended as “right”. They discuss creating safe spaces for honest conversation, and moving from a “me” to a “we” mindset. Scott and Bill challenge us to reframe individual demands into shared goals.

Topics Bill Thrall and Scott Boyd discuss in this episode:

(01:19) Expectations are an innate part of being human, but unmet expectations are a major source of wounding and pain.

(02:54) How we can build trust by becoming honest about our expectations while avoiding the temptation to declare those expectations right.

(05:03) Shifting from discussing individual expectations of one another to discussing shared expectations.

(12:40) How hidden expectations remain unspoken, continue to produce disappointment, and can eventually create dysfunction in relationships.

(18:02) Relational freedom does not mean eliminating disappointment, but learning to face the disappointments caused by unmet expectations together.

Bill Thrall, Scott Boyd, and the Living Influence team brought this episode to you. 

Learn about Living Influence: https://www.livinginfluence.com/

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Learn about Bill Thrall’s books: https://www.livinginfluence.com/books

This episode was produced by Story On Media: https://www.storyon.co/